This week’s episode of the Crime Cafe features another story from The Adventures of Philip Marlowe.
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The following is an unedited AI-generated transcript. Does an awesome job, huh? :)
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Hi, everyone.
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This is The Crime Café, your podcasting source of great crime suspense and thriller writing.
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I'm your host, Debbi Mack.
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Before I bring on my guest,
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I'll just remind you that The Crime Café has two e-books for sale,
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the nine-book box set and the short story anthology.
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You can find the buy links for both on my website, debbiemack.com, under the Crime Café link.
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If you'd like to
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You can also get a free copy of either book if you become a Patreon supporter.
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You'll get that and much more if you support the podcast on Patreon,
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along with our eternal gratitude for doing so.
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Unfortunately, our scheduled guest was unable to make it this week.
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However,
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I have instead another episode from the files of Philip Marlowe,
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Private Eye,
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Daring Young Dame on the Flying Trapeze.
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Enjoy!
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For the safety of your smile, use Pepsodent twice a day, see your dentist twice a year.
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Lever Brothers Company presents the Pepsodent program,
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The Adventures of Philip Marlowe,
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starring Van Heflin.
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Pepsodent presents Philip Marlowe, Raymond Chandler's famous private detective.
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You've seen him on the screen in Lady and the Lake,
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Murder,
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My Sweet,
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The Brasher Doubloon,
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and The Big Sleep.
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Now Pepsodent brings you the adventures of Philip Marlowe on the air and starring
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MGM's brilliant and dynamic young actor,
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Van Heflin.
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Pepsodent
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There comes a certain time in the year when I don't want to see midget auto races.
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I just want to see midgets.
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When I prefer sawdust to stardust, and popcorn to all other kinds of corn available in Hollywood.
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The circus was moving in on the grounds at Washington Boulevard and Hill Street,
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and I was turning in my usual fine job as sidewalk supervisor.
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It was exciting.
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It brought back all the sounds and sensations and convictions of childhood.
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And then someone had me firmly by the wrist,
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and I turned to look into a pair of steady,
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smoky,
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dark eyes that could be dangerous.
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Excuse me, sir, but you are a private detective?
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I'm a detective, but I don't get much privacy.
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Yeah, my name is Ralph Tassinari.
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Who told you I was a detective?
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My feet aren't that flat.
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Do you know a gentleman named Al Sicanolfi?
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Well, I know an Al Sicanolfi.
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He pointed you out.
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He asked me what was the big idea.
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What was my angle hiring a private detective?
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He gave me an idea.
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When has Al Sicanolfi had any ideas to spare?
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Mr. Marlowe, besides owning one-third of this very fine little circus, I am Tassinari.
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Of Tassinari, the Swede, and Glorian.
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Trafisto.
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The most brilliant aerial act in the business.
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I own this circus with Glorian and the Swede.
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Well, where does Al Sicanolfi fit in here?
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Now, the Swede gets drunk and gambles fantastic sums of money.
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This circus is worth a quarter of a million dollars.
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Already, the Swede has gambled away much more than his third of the circus.
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And a partner may sell out his other partners without even consulting them.
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Oh, you're afraid the Swede will sell you out to pay for his debts.
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Yeah, and if he did that, I should not hesitate to... Uh-oh, watch yourself.
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Uh, I'll take it off.
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It has made it plain that the gamblers expect payment immediately.
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Would you consider giving us your protection during the three days we're going to be here?
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$25 a day in expenses.
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That's the nut.
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Cheap enough.
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I know, but you see, I'm a sucker for circuses.
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Yeah?
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Is this the office of Philip Marlowe?
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Better still, this is Philip Marlowe.
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Didn't he?
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Go ahead.
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This is his partner, Glorianne.
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I'm in a downtown bar with a Swede, and he's terribly drunk.
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I know this isn't your job, but won't you come down and help me get him sobered up for the night?
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Please?
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All right.
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Mother Marlowe will be right down.
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I found the Main Street bar where Glorianne said I'd find her and the Swede.
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The Swede was potted like Grandma's begonia.
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And with the help of the bartender and four professional loafers, we got him into my car.
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I told Gloria to drive.
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Ah, ah, lay me alone, will you?
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I'm all right.
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Well, just take it easy.
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Where shall I drive, Mr. Marlowe?
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Jordan Street Receiving Hospital.
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I'll stay back here and wrestle the Swede for the championship.
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I just left him alone for an hour to do some shopping.
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I'm telling you something, honey girl.
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That Tesson there, he makes any more passes at you, I'll beat him brainless.
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Oh, please don't pay any attention to him, Mr. Marlowe.
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He thinks everyone at this circus is in love with me.
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Okay, now back in your seat, Roger.
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Yeah, yeah, and that flip doctor, too.
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Oh, be still.
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I'm telling you something, honey girl.
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One of these days,
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I'm going to get absent-minded on that trapeze,
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and I'm not going to catch you,
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friend Tassinari.
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How's that, huh?
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Don't listen to him, Mr. Marlowe.
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Well, then tell muscles to let go of my ear.
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Yeah, perfect crime.
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Who'd know it was an accident or not?
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And then I'd own half a circus instead of just a third.
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Please, Mr. Marlowe.
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He's drunk.
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Yeah, but drunk or sober, you've got one doozy of an idea there.
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Drunk or sober.
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Hey, my wrist.
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Watch that.
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I knew some interns at Georgia Street Receiving Hospital who obliged with some oxygen and a mask.
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A half hour of breathing that oxygen deeply in the Swede was stone cold sober and back in my car again.
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He was making certain cagey explanations.
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Uh, Marlowe, you don't want to take that stuff I was mumbling about seriously, you know, I...
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I was drunk.
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You certainly were.
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After all, Gloria Ann's my wife.
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Oh?
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Naturally, I don't like other guys giving her the eye.
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But that screwy talk about me dropping Tassinari accidentally on purpose.
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Oh, forget it.
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Oh, no.
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Yeah, the perfect crime.
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I was only talking, Marlowe.
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I wouldn't do that to Tassinari.
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Of course not.
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He'd be all broken up about it, wouldn't he?
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I sat in a field box that evening at this small, neat circus unwound toward the big act.
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And the big moment arrived with butterflies warming up in my stomach and a pulse
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thumping madly in my neck.
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on the high trapeze.
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Ladies and gentlemen,
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the living and justifying Passaneri and the Swede came bounding into the arena and
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over to the two spidery ladders that zoomed up into the very peak of the big tent.
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Up there where it was hot, high, and dangerous.
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Two magnificently made men climbing that slim ladder.
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Their brilliant capes flowing behind them, going up higher, smaller, higher.
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And then... They were on their tiny platforms, removing their capes grandiosely.
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And they turned, faced each other across the void like divers.
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Not a voice, not a breath, not a sound.
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I began to perspire.
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The net was being gathered back...
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Then suddenly,
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Passaneri raised his right arm and smiled,
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dropped his arm,
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and the Swedes shot out into space like a comet,
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and the gay,
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waltzing,
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somehow insane music began.
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The End
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It was all the announcer said, at least to me.
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Daring and terrifying.
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Whirl and spin and contact.
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Swing, swing, swing and spin.
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Spinning and whirling, contact and break.
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Hands locked to rosined hands, contact and break.
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Spin, whirl, cartwheel and contact.
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Swing, swing, swing, and leap.
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Split second timing and the split second split again,
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with crappies bars flying into place where and when they were needed.
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I left away my head drumming and swimming.
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And I looked up again.
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I looked up and the thing that had been tying my stomach in cold hard knots,
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the thing I was afraid of,
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happened.
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Look out!
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The music played a gay tune.
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The clowns poured into the arena, grinning happily.
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I saw the youngish, handsome doctor race across the sawdust, followed by Gloria.
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Across the arena, I saw Al Sicanolfi get up and disappear into the crowd.
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I went out, too.
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Outside, I managed to get a shaking match to a quaking cigarette.
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In my mind, I heard again and again the drunken voice of the flying Swede come back to me.
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One of these days,
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I'm going to get abso-minded on that trapeze,
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and I'm not going to catch your friend,
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Tassinari.
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How's that, huh?
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Only it was all wrong.
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It didn't add up.
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Because the body that had plummeted to the ground hadn't been the body of Ralph Tassinari.
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but of the man who had plotted the perfect crime, Gloriana's husband, the flying Swede.
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Mother.
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What?
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Oh.
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Oh.
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You were in there?
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Yes, I saw it, Gloria.
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I think I could kill Ralph for this.
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You think Tassinari dropped your husband purposely?
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What do you think?
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Look, Lorraine, I took this job, you know why.
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Well, all this reminded me of myself when I was a kid reading Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn and believing.
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Well, I still believe in him.
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I felt the same way about the circus.
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The last childish illusions.
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The man holds on to you so he doesn't get too hard.
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You're not tough at all, are you?
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I was going to like this job, and then this happened.
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Do you know what I'm talking about?
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Yes, sir.
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I'm sorry we failed.
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Look, Lorraine, the Swede is dead and you think Tassinari killed him, but it's the perfect crime.
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You can't prove anything.
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Look,
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maybe I didn't love the Swede very much,
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but he was my husband and on the square...
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Did you love Tassinari?
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If I did, it's all over now.
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I'm going to prove to everybody in circus business at least that he killed my husband.
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Yeah, well, how?
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You'll see, little boy.
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Good night.
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Good night.
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I watched her go back into the big tent,
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and then I drove home and dreamed all night of Al Saganolfi smiling his yellow
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smile and disappearing into the crowd.
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I got up late and went down for coffee in a newspaper.
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The story was there on page one.
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Also,
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a silky,
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leggy picture of Gloriana beneath it,
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the caption reading,
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Show must go on,
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dares high trapeze in the passenary after mate falls to death.
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I looked at my watch.
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It was late, later than I thought.
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For the daring young dame on the flying trapeze, it was almost too late.
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You are listening to The Adventures of Philip Marlowe, starring Van Heflin.
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Get it without delay.
(00:13:26):
We continue with the adventures of Philip Marlowe,
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created by Raymond Chandler and starring Van Heflin,
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who appears by arrangement with Metro-Golden-Mare.
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Producers of The Hucksters, starring Clark Gable.
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The Lion Act was going on when I arrived at the circus grounds and practically ran to Gloria Ann's tent.
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She was in her tights and cloak ready to go on.
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Look, Gloria Ann, you're kidding.
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This is a gag.
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You're not going up there.
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One minute, little boy.
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Well, you're out of your mind.
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I'm going up with Pastor Nari to prove you to killed a thief.
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You add that up.
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My arms are full of bundles.
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Pastor Nari agreed to go up with me.
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Why?
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Why aren't his nerves shattered after yesterday?
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Because he knows he didn't make a mistake yesterday.
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He knows he dropped my husband purposely.
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And not because his timing or reactions were wrong.
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Do I make sense?
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Up to a point.
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You're thinking he may drop me.
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And I wouldn't like that.
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He won't drop me.
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What makes you so sure?
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Because Tosinari loves me.
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He wants me.
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Does that make sense?
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Yeah.
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Yeah, that makes a lot of sense.
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Well, go to it, little girl.
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I watched Glorianne so small and slim and fragile as she went up that thin ladder.
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My throat swelled tight and the butterflies took off in my stomach again.
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She was on the platform, removing her silk cape, folding it carefully over the rail.
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They were facing each other, smiling.
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Smiling.
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Dead, sultry silence.
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Then...
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For minutes, I sat there, petrified, watching her cold sweat channel down my back.
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For ten minutes, I stopped breathing.
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I died.
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Once, only once, I had to close my eyes.
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And in that second, I heard the crowd roar.
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Everyone was standing up, screaming and goggle-eyed.
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I groped to my feet, and there she was.
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Bowing and laughing and throwing kisses into the crowd and at Tassinari and at me.
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Then she pirouetted and ran up the ramp to her dressing tent.
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I got there with Tassinari.
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Her eyes warmed for me and then froze again for Tassinari.
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Come in, little boy.
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And you, Tassinari.
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Tassinari?
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Ralph also is a name I bear.
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Today I talk to Tassinari.
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Now I want Mr. Moller to hear what I have to say to you.
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Which is first that I'm through with you.
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Corianne, not because of the accident.
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Yes, but because it was not an accident.
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You don't believe that?
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May I suggest that maybe Al Sicanolfi has a meaty part in this picture?
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No.
(00:16:38):
Hasanari here killed a Swede.
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Corianne, that's not true.
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Dr. Stowe seems to think as I do.
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Ah, yes, Dr. Stowe.
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I did pass your tent last night after the accident.
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Accident?
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I heard you and the kaffite unsuccessful doctor speaking together, oh, so intimately.
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Bear your insult, Hasanari.
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Speaking together, deciding conveniently, perhaps, that I'd kill a Swede.
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Richard never accused you.
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He only said that... Oh, he's the one, eh?
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Richard.
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Get out.
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If I wanted to murder a man, it would be easy to take my gun from my trunk and shoot him.
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Yeah, but that wouldn't be the perfect crime.
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Why should I want to kill the Swede?
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Because he might have sold you out to pay his debts.
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Because you'd get half of his share of the circus.
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Because you were in love with his wife.
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I see.
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You think you have a case, huh?
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I hope not.
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Florianne knows what I mean.
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Only perhaps Tosinaya better go now.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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I'm very sorry, Florianne.
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For all of us.
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Good day.
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Good day, Miss Tamaro.
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He padded out softly like a panther, resentment and hatred smoldering in his eyes.
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That was horrible, little boy.
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I'd better lie down now.
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I left wondering if there'd be a show that night, tradition or no tradition.
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I walked for a half an hour and then a police squad car came screaming down
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Washington Boulevard toward the circus grounds.
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Mad dogs and Englishmen go out in the noonday sun, but Marlowe runs in it.
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I found a small colony of cops in one of the dressing tents.
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The man on the cot.
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had taken a lot of pulses in his time, but he didn't have a single one to show for it, not even his own.
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Good-looking, youngish Dr. Richard W. Stowe was dead.
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Detective Lieutenant Ibera held out a small automatic to me.
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Hello, Marlowe.
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I hear you've been masterminding things around here lately.
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Ever see this gun before?
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I may have heard of it.
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A man named Ralph Tassinari, connected with his show, has disappeared.
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Know something about that?
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He was fresh from a lover's quarrel last I saw him.
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Ah?
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Well, maybe just out walking it off.
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Possibly.
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But the dead doctor and Tassinari both went for a pretty little trapeze queen named Gloria Ann.
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Was anything stolen here?
(00:19:19):
No.
(00:19:20):
The circus hand who heard the muffled shot came running before anything could have been taken.
(00:19:24):
Well, the gal, Gloria Ann, how does she feel about this?
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She's in her tent, heavily committed to a case of hysterics.
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Uh, Marlowe, divvy's on any information you get out of her.
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Look, Laurie Ann, you can't go on like this.
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Now let me get something for you.
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I'll be all right.
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Just to set it, to settle your nerves.
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Oh, no, we never take that thing.
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It's bad for going up on a trap.
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No.
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No, I'll sleep.
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That's the best thing.
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Sleep.
(00:20:06):
You can't go up there tonight.
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Anyway, Tassinari's missing.
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I'll go see what I can find for you.
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I rummaged through Dr. Stowe's medical bag while Ibera watched from across the tent
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I found a small black book.
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I leafed through it with my hand still hidden in the bag.
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It was a small case history book with sketchy data about his cases,
(00:20:37):
the treatment given,
(00:20:38):
the medication prescribed.
(00:20:41):
I very quietly tore out the last page,
(00:20:44):
palmed it,
(00:20:44):
and slipped it in my pocket as I creaked to an approximate upright position.
(00:20:48):
Find anything to quiet the little woman, Myron?
(00:20:51):
No, not a thing, Lieutenant, not a thing.
(00:20:54):
I'll try a drugstore.
(00:21:02):
Tablets of cyclodome, grains one and a half.
(00:21:06):
One tablet with warm water for nerves or sleep.
(00:21:09):
What is it?
(00:21:10):
It's a common sedative, but I can't sell you any without a prescription.
(00:21:15):
Well, can you tell me anything about those drugs?
(00:21:17):
Some, but you will find a lot more in Dr. Toral Solman's textbook on pharmacology.
(00:21:23):
Textbook on pharmacology.
(00:21:25):
It's only in the main library, I think, but it's complete.
(00:21:28):
That'll tell you all you want to know, I'm sure.
(00:21:39):
The druggist was right.
(00:21:40):
The textbook of pharmacology told me all I wanted to know.
(00:21:43):
Also, this was a very limited edition.
(00:21:48):
It was probably the only one of its kind that had on the page devoted to cyclodrome
(00:21:54):
a smudge of lipstick in the shape of a woman's finger.
(00:22:08):
It was all and more than I wanted to know.
(00:22:11):
And all at once, I was old.
(00:22:14):
Very old.
(00:22:16):
From now on, I was going to leave illusions to high school girls and magicians.
(00:22:24):
Hello, little boy.
(00:22:28):
Back again.
(00:22:29):
I see you're dressed for work, Lorianne.
(00:22:31):
Has the night returned?
(00:22:33):
I wouldn't know.
(00:22:35):
But I think I do know who killed the Swede.
(00:22:37):
Tassinari.
(00:22:38):
I gravely doubt that.
(00:22:39):
Well, then who?
(00:22:41):
Not Alfred and Alfie.
(00:22:43):
Glorian,
(00:22:44):
you're a dainty little thing,
(00:22:45):
and that's a particular reason why you should break yourself of little unsightly habits,
(00:22:51):
like touching your fingers to your mouth to turn back pages in books.
(00:22:57):
Are you all right, little boy?
(00:22:59):
Was the Swede all right when he went up with Tassinari last night?
(00:23:04):
Or was he just slightly under the influence of a sedative drug that calms the nerves?
(00:23:08):
Yes, but slows up their reaction time.
(00:23:12):
I don't understand such matters.
(00:23:14):
You admitted to me today that it isn't wise to take such sedatives before your act.
(00:23:19):
But you did get a prescription for such tablets from Dr. Stowe and you said nothing about them.
(00:23:23):
Well, I was upset after the Swede was killed.
(00:23:25):
I needed something.
(00:23:26):
But according to Dr. Stowe's case book, you got the tablets before the Swede was killed.
(00:23:31):
And you left him at the bar for an hour yesterday while you did a little medical
(00:23:35):
research at the main library.
(00:23:37):
And that night, the Swede split second time.
(00:23:40):
He didn't quite split, did he?
(00:23:43):
Of course you weren't afraid to go up with Tassinari today.
(00:23:48):
He didn't miss the Swede.
(00:23:49):
The Swede missed him.
(00:23:50):
I hated him.
(00:23:54):
You didn't want him.
(00:23:56):
You just wanted the circus, all of it.
(00:23:58):
So you killed the Swede with his own perfect crime.
(00:24:01):
Only it was too perfect.
(00:24:03):
You couldn't pin the murder on Tassinari.
(00:24:06):
You had to think of something more down to earth.
(00:24:10):
Go on, little boy.
(00:24:11):
Make Gloria Ann proud of you.
(00:24:14):
Dr. Stowe knew that you hated your husband.
(00:24:17):
He knew that you had those tablets.
(00:24:18):
He knew that the Swede didn't make mistakes.
(00:24:22):
Last night when Tassinari heard you and Stowe whispering together,
(00:24:25):
Stowe was telling you what he suspected,
(00:24:27):
wasn't he?
(00:24:28):
He was a doctor and he is furious at the thought of being used in a murder.
(00:24:31):
You're raising your voice.
(00:24:33):
You look certain.
(00:24:33):
No.
(00:24:35):
Well, if you didn't shut up the doctor, he'd talk.
(00:24:37):
So you shot him with Tassinari's gun after staging a very nice row with Tassinari in front of me.
(00:24:43):
That would pin it on Tassinari.
(00:24:46):
You let Stowe take you in his arms to muffle the shop.
(00:24:50):
That was particularly pretty.
(00:24:53):
No, little boy.
(00:24:54):
It was not.
(00:24:56):
No, it was not.
(00:24:59):
Little boy, you've had a busy day.
(00:25:04):
Well, it's time that I grew up anyway.
(00:25:07):
That's for my act.
(00:25:08):
Ladies and gentlemen, Captain Harry and Gloria.
(00:25:16):
And Gloria.
(00:25:17):
And Gloria.
(00:25:18):
I've sent for the police, Gloria, and they'll be here pretty soon.
(00:25:21):
Little boy!
(00:25:22):
Asanay is there.
(00:25:24):
He's waiting in the runway across the arena.
(00:25:26):
He came back!
(00:25:27):
He doesn't even know he's wanted, probably.
(00:25:29):
Oh, little boy, I have let you down.
(00:25:32):
Let me make it up a little.
(00:25:34):
Let me go out there.
(00:25:35):
Will you come down again?
(00:25:37):
Yes, of course.
(00:25:38):
By the ladder, I mean.
(00:25:39):
I won't let you down again, little boy.
(00:25:41):
I promise it.
(00:25:42):
We circus people won't disappoint you again.
(00:25:45):
Please.
(00:25:46):
They're waiting.
(00:25:48):
Well, the show must go on, mustn't it?
(00:25:51):
All right, go ahead, lady.
(00:25:52):
They're waiting.
(00:25:56):
She ran out laughing, throwing kisses, and I walked out after her.
(00:26:01):
Stood in the runway watching.
(00:26:02):
I watched the small, delicate figure going up the ladder.
(00:26:06):
Then she was at the platform.
(00:26:08):
Rosin on shoes, rosin on the hands and wrists.
(00:26:12):
And sultry silence, not a voice.
(00:26:20):
raising her hand in a gesture of exquisite grace and sureness and smiling and pessimism.
(00:26:26):
Smiling.
(00:26:28):
And there it was.
(00:26:29):
This was it.
(00:26:31):
There.
(00:26:41):
Ghostly packs of small fry from my school days gaped up with me and shivered with kid delight.
(00:26:48):
I was a kid again, walking up at the circus guy and the circus lady.
(00:26:53):
The daring young dame on the flying trapeze, Passaneri and Glorianne.
(00:26:58):
Or positively, the last performance anywhere on earth.
(00:27:13):
You have just heard Van Heflin starring in the new mystery series,
(00:27:17):
Raymond Chandler's The Adventures of Philip Marlowe,
(00:27:19):
brought to you by the Lever Brothers Company,
(00:27:21):
makers of Pepsodent.
(00:27:23):
Van Heflin will return in just a moment.
(00:27:26):
Now, here is Van Heflin, star of The Adventures of Philip Marlowe.
(00:27:29):
King Leopardi had the hottest trumpet and the coldest eye in show business,
(00:27:35):
and he loved yellow silk,
(00:27:36):
so they called him the King in Yellow.
(00:27:39):
We consider his short,
(00:27:40):
eventful life next week when,
(00:27:42):
as Philip Marlowe,
(00:27:43):
I have some business with the King in Yellow.
(00:27:51):
Tonight's story was written by Milton Geiger,
(00:27:53):
based on the character of Philip Marlowe,
(00:27:55):
the screen's most famous private detective,
(00:27:57):
created by Raymond Chandler.
(00:27:59):
Heard with Van Heflin tonight as Glory Ann was Lorene Tuttle.
(00:28:03):
The original music was composed and conducted by Lynn Murray.
(00:28:06):
This is Wendell Niles inviting you to listen again next week at this same time to
(00:28:10):
another exciting mystery on The Adventures of Philip Marlowe,
(00:28:13):
starring Van Heflin with a distinguished cast.
(00:28:17):
This is NBC, the national broadcasting company.
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